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Change Maker – you!

Joy@Work #8

– Change Maker you!

By Vanda North

 

For the better part of a year I have been sharing ways to increase your joy at work, I do hope that you are experiencing an increase in your joy quotient. As I look back over the topics that have been covered, there is a central theme of managing change, supported by how the small things can make a big positive difference. So, for this final chapter, I will continue with the change focus as it is so very important.

Making a choice to develop the skills and qualities to become a ‘Change Maker’ can set you ahead for work and life in general. Do you feel that you are a Change Maker? I know that you are already one and what follows will allow you to appreciate yourself and thrive in any situation. There is a full profile you may take called The Change Maker Profile, available here: (https://www.thechangemakergroup.com/thechangemakerprofile which will provide you with an in-depth assessment, what follows here is an introduction. There are five roles to change making and they are:

   Game Changer           Strategist               PlayMaker           Implementer               Polisher

Game Changer

– who composes the original music, new arrangements and new ideas

The Strategist

– who conceives and controls the whole show, concerts to contracts

The PlayMaker

–  who coordinates who is in the orchestra and conducts the music

The Implementer

– who causes the actual instruments to be played to make the music!

The Polisher

– who completes and refines all the details for a quality performance.

Which are you? You may be a combination of two of three, but there will be one role that will attract you most. The important point here is that ALL of them are crucial for change to happen. No one role will make change happen: it is like an un-round wheel, very bumpy and inefficient.

There are three aspects to developing your Change Maker roles, they are:

  • Conviction
  • Confidence and
  • Commitment

Conviction

This is your belief, certainty, faith, position, passion, sentiment or persuasion.
It is a strong feeling that you are able to achieve or attain a specific goal.
You can see it in your mind’s eye – you can almost smell and taste it.
It is the filter through which you see all your life, the opportunities, the focus, your raison d’etre. Your convictions will shape what you do, how you do it and why those around you respond as they do.

Have you thought about those things that you are convinced about?
It may well be that, rather like the relationship of the fish and water, it is so all about you that you haven’t given them much conscious attention.

A friend, partner or relation may be a help here. Ask them to note when you have particularly strong views about something. What gets you shouting to the TV?! What groups / hobbies / avocations really get you stirred up?

Conviction is a robust energy, it can make you feel ‘alive’ and if you are consciously aware of it and work / play with your convictions, you are unstoppable.

Confidence

Next is your confidence or self-esteem level, how would you rate yourself?
I am not talking about a braggadocios, bombarding personality (which like bullying is often trying to cover a very low self-concept) but that quiet, strong, self-assured feeling of, ‘I can’,
‘I am able’ or at least, ‘I will find a way’.

How to develop that? There are two main ways, best to do both at once! One is from the outside in – how do you look? Being neat, looking ‘cared for’, shoes clean, hair trim, all show that you have taken some trouble over your appearance. How do you move, walk and hold yourself? All these can help you to feel more confident on the inside.

The other is from the inside out – and that is more incremental. In the Mind Chi Basic 8-minute routine (www.MindChi.com) step number 4 is to take one minute to go over all your successes, big and small from the past 24 hours. Done every day you build up your success bank, you become more aware and realise all those things you can do and even do well!

Commitment

As David Lloyd George says ‘You can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps’!
Don’t make the decision to commit lightly, mull it for a while and then one day it will feel right, and you will commit. When you do it is often almost a relief – you have decided – you know where you want to end up. Even if you feel a bit scared, that too is a good motivator. However, if you really think ‘Oh nooooo!’ then return to the mull stage.

When you have committed, then tell people, they will ask you how you are progressing and even more, may make connections, introductions and share ideas to help you achieve your goal. People generally admire and respect a commitment. A great quote, sometimes accredited to Goethe, about commitment is: Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.

 Bespoke resilience strategies for the five Change Maker roles:

Blending the 8-steps of the Mind Chi Basic routine with the five roles of the Change Maker you will see below examples of things that often happen in the work place can either be a resilience booster or sucker. What is your environment like? What can you do to make sure that you have more resilience boosters in your day than suckers? How can you support your team members, how can they support you?

One of the great tenants of Joy@Work, is that frequently a small action will make a very positive outcome for yourself and for those around you. Very worthwhile I hope you feel. I wish you much Joy@Work, home and in life.

Vanda North, The Resilient Warrior

“Will it help?”

Will it help? 

This is such a simple question and so very helpful.

Will it help?

Will it help?

If you saw the film The Bridge of Spies, you will have seen it was the Russian Spy’s response to the American lawyer’s question ‘Aren’t you worried?’

Next time you hear a friend (or yourself) worrying over something, going over and over the same territory, just stop for a moment and with concern ask, ‘Will it help?’ The answer will be no and in fact it is counterproductive. When your brain perceives that it is under threat in some way, it goes down a gear to basic functioning. Your brain prepares for the classic fight or flight response. You are ready for physically managing an emergency, but not the higher level frontal lobe consideration and decision making that the situation would require.

Next time you hear a friend (or yourself) complaining or getting frustrated about something and those same chicken circles of negative thinking are occurring, just think or say thoughtfully, ‘Will it help?’ Of course the answer is that it will not, meanwhile you have got yourself all upset and filled with the bad chemicals and the situation is still as it was. Now that was a waste of your precious energy.

Next time you hear a friend (or yourself) feeling guilty and talking about how they feel so bad because of so and so… Gently ask, ‘Will it help?’  I think you may be seeing a pattern here! Yet we all can take up much precious time and waste our energy resources with these behaviours. Guilt is a very heavy and totally useless emotion, it can grey a whole section of your life.

Next time you hear a friend (or yourself) ‘awfulising’ or using the ‘always’ or ‘never’ words with some behaviour or other, just wait for a little while and then considerately ask, ‘Will it help?’ Really push for an answer, because if you are adding some constructive ideas or creative solutions it IS helpful, however if you are just going round and round in a downward spiral, then realising that not only is it not helping in any way, it is actually very destructive for your wellbeing and constructive thinking.

What TO do?
After you have answered the ‘Will it help?’ question – and the answer is inevitably ‘No!’  Then a very simple action and one that WILL help you to redirect this habit is this:

  1. Keep a running list of those things that take up your mind, every time you find you are thinking or talking about them, write them down. If it is the same thing again, add a mark. Write them down and put them aside for now. Because you know you and those items will have a special time, later that day.
  2. Pick a time, say between work and coming home, or after supper when you can take 20 minutes to yourself. Find a comfy place to sit and take an ‘empty book’ or some nice paper, or your journal and a favourite coloured pen and the list you created from the day, because now you have a whole 20 minutes to worry / fret / guilt / awfulise and complain about them. Write it all out, round and round, down and down.
  3. At the end of the 20 minutes put it all away and you will find your brain feels very satisfied, because you have given it attention for these things. If, perchance any constructive thoughts should occur, you need to put those on a separate page and consider them later. This is just for useless, inept, worthless, waste of time, inadequate thinking.
  4. Many times you will find that it is so ridiculous that you are unable to fill the 20 minutes, in which case register this as you waste all those moments in your day and give less and less power to them. If you are able to fill your 20 minutes, then you may wish to join the ‘worried man (as in hu-man)  bloggers’ association.

AND remember step 3 of the Mind Chi Basic 8 steps, where you look for things you wish you had said or done differently in the past 24 hours. You are looking for what you would rather do if they occur again and to start to put the new behaviour in place. Look for the small success steps, this is probably a well-rehearsed habit and so may take a time to change. Be sure to celebrate your successes in step 4 of the Mind Chi Basic – looking for what went well in the past 24 hours. Here is a link to the YouTube of those steps and the map of the 8 steps and an app that will time the full 8 minutes for you:

For the Mind Chi YouTube teaching the Mind Chi Basic 8 steps (there are 8 videos, building to the 8 steps): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLUMph1aHRU&feature=channel&list=
Specifically for step 3: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTIgUPJYN3U

For the Mind Chi app (briefly teaches and times the Mind Chi Basic 8 minute routine): https://appsto.re/gb/_TMVab.i

For a link to the website that gives a one page map and explanation:  http://www.mindchi.com/mind-chi-basic-8-steps/

Please let Chi & I know if this was a help for you: Chi@MindChi.com or Vanda@MindChi.com