The Festive Holiday Horror of TIME and the Mind Chi Happiness to overcome it
Hit the road running and don’t stop until you collapse! The forth Festive Holiday Horror looks at where you spend your TIME and how to regain your control.
4. How much TIME it all takes!
If there is one universal (right along with how much it all COSTS) it is how much TIME is needed on TOP of an already overwhelming, jam-packed schedule. No wonder you feel beat!
Your heart sinks and you get that whizzy feeling in your stomach every time you contemplate the
impossible list of things that HAVE to be done – not to even think about what you might LIKE to do!
If you normally do not have enough time, then you will certainly NOT have enough now. Still you push yourself harder and harder, get up earlier; dash through the day; squeezing activities in every second that you can; skiving off work a bit; doing your personal things on work time (when you think no-one is watching) staying up later; skipping meals and grabbing some ‘fast food’; falling into bed absolutely exhausted. ‘And I am supposed to be HAPPY??!!’
Everyone is expecting this and that from you and worse you have accepted their rules and are killing yourself to try to make it all happen. Watch the faces of the people in the shops or as they drive their cars, do they look happy? And how do you look?
You need TIME to find gifts; wrap gifts; pack and post gifts; (return gifts!) buy food; cook food; arrange parties and family gatherings; attend parties and family gatherings; maybe travel;
buy decorations; put up decorations; buy cards (if you still do this!) post cards; open and read cards from others; display cards; dispose of cards! buy your holiday outfit; see friends; listen to friend’s woes and ALL of your ‘usual’ jobs as well! You need help!
Mind Chi Festive Holiday Happiness – PUSH BACK!
It is TIME (ha ha!) to grab back your reins of control. There are 24 hours in a day, we all have the same and what is CRUCIAL is to make the best use of them. What does that mean? Well, some of those new Mind Chi skills that we have mentioned need to be employed here too.
Begin by just STOPPING! Oh breathe deep and full breaths for a minute.
Think about those closest and most important to you and jot a few things that you may wish to do for or with them. Think of your ‘usual’ to do list and CROSS SOME OF THE USUAL ITEMS OFF – the key point is that YOU CANNOT DO IT ALL! So for each festive thing that you add, remove a usual thing (most things won’t matter if they are left for a few days). You need the big picture – what / who is most important and ditch (or delay) the rest.
Use your POWER to PUSH BACK. Every day, (in future start before Thanksgiving) and carve a little ‘DISCRECIONARY TIME’ – moments that YOU get to choose what you do (even if it is NOTHING!) Just feel yourself gently leaning against the TIME pressure. Savour all the increments you gather back. Remember TIME is a very mallable commodity (one minute hanging over a cliff or one minute cuddling your family!)
Use your POWER to say ‘NO!’ (as nicely as you are able). You will be amazed at how something that you were going to burst a blood vessel over and if you ask ‘Might I do this later?’ ‘Do you really need this now?’ ‘Could I leave this out?’ you may find it just literally melts away before you. Oh triumph!
Question all those things you think you ‘should’ and ‘aught’ to do (more information on these in Horror number eight) such as sending festive cards; if you are using them to be in touch, how about beginning a phone rota or send an email. Really BE in touch, rather then mindlessly putting a pre-printed card in the post. STOP the silliness of giving cards to people you see – just say, ‘Thank you, and I am wishing you (with a hug if appropriate) a Happy (fill in the festivity)’.
Question all the gift giving (especially in these economic times). You might want to give a gift for the person’s birthday and only a token over the general festivities. Or better still; give a gift of your TIME or FOOD to some one less fortunate.
Set a new ritual, it doesn’t have to be what it always was. In fact with the changing family structure it seldom is. So create a new way to celebrate that is fitting for this Festive Season.
Be ‘in the flow’ – there are days when you can have a directive goal, but not specifics and just flow through, taking plenty of breaks and achieve a wonderful amount AND feel RELAXED. One way to access flow state is to set a timer and then lose yourself in the joy of the activity.
To recap, the 8 positive actions for Mind Chi Festive Holiday Happiness to overcome the Horror of TIME are:
- PUSH BACK by setting yourself time limits –‘I will only take one hour in these shops’.
- PUSH BACK by giving yourself a reward when finished (as procrastination is a real TIME waster)
– ‘A cup of tea when I complete this task’.
- PUSH BACK by grouping friends / activities for ONE meeting or journey (rather than several).
- PUSH BACK by re-assessing what you really NEED or WANT to do. Question if what was, is still appropriate.
- PUSH BACK by STOPPING and creating the big picture of what matters, ask yourself ‘What will we remember?’
- PUSH BACK by not doing some of your ‘usual’ tasks, something must go!
- PUSH BACK by saying ‘NO!’ (nicely) and questioning your ‘shoulds’ and ‘aughts’.
- PUSH BACK by creating new rituals and crafting ‘flow’ days for you to enjoy.
© Mind Chi 2011